Texas Heat vs. Canadian Cold

A classmate in my Multimedia Authoring class recently published a video that made amazing use of Intellectual Montage by combining video of herself running in the sweltering heat and clips from a 1935 Disney classic, “Mickey’s Fire Brigade”.

The contrast between the hot runner, the cartoon houses on fire, the runner quenching her thirst and the fire being put out by Mickey and his brigade got me thinking about the extreme opposite of this experience.

I’m talking about C-C-C-C-Canadian C-C-C-Cold!

I have experienced the dry heat in Afghanistan, and the wet heat in Dubai, but for me, they are manageable. The cold, now that’s another story! Here are a few photos I have taken depicting how awful the cold is!

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I never liked the cold.  Even growing up, I felt as though I was born in the wrong country.  I suffer from geographic identity disorder. Since I have lived in Colorado, I’ve enjoyed the relatively warmer climate along the Front Range, having to deal with the cold only when I travel 3,000 feet into the mountains for skiing!

What does extreme cold feel like?  Wellllll…….

  • Your nostrils freeze together.  You can’t breathe without opening your mouth. And when you do, it feels like you just drank a Slurpee really fast.
  • You get ice cream headaches. Without the ice cream!
  • You can’t feel your fingers!  Or your toes!
  • Your ears and your nose burn.
  • You just want to jump into the nearest fire pit you can find.
  • It takes you two hours just to get dressed (in multiple layers).
  • Then you realize you have to go to the bathroom.
  • You have to take out a loan to pay your heating bill.

Basically, it feels like this:

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I have been living in Colorado for two years now.  Just recently, I had to make a business trip back to Ottawa, Canada in February. My boss, who was from California was convinced within the first 5 minutes of being outside that he had frostbite. I wondered how I ever survived in Canada for the first 38 years of my life. We both couldn’t wait to get back to the warmer climate.

Did I mention that I hate the cold?  In case my point hasn’t been made, here are a few more photos of my “I hate the cold” face.

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There really is only one solution to avoid this terrible affliction called cold.

Move somewhere warm.  Like Texas, maybe.

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